Ghost Roommate 101
by Hazaazel
Summary: He has a roommate, and they're floating. Like. Like a ghost. Suga totally did not pay for that shit. - Living through college and monsters can be tough, but Suga has an exceptional bad luck. Written for the 2015 Daisuga week, Day 7


It is Halloween as I am writing this. Don't blame me for ghost!Daichi (and also all the magical crap) (and look ! I've done only one prompt today !)

Daisuga week, day 7: **Haunted house** or Anniversary

* * *

Suga paid extra for this dorm. He paid _extra_ – money, actual money – for this dorm and it's the crappiest he has ever been in. At least he'll be alone inside, which means he can sleep in his boxers and nobody is going to complain.

oo

So someone decided to pay extra, uh. Well fuck them, they'll pay extra for the repairs too. It's _his_ dorm, for heaven's sake, why is Ukai still trying to rent it ?

oo

He's a bit groggy but there is _someone_ putting their _cold_ fingers on his lower back and no once can blame him for hissing at them to fuck off before even opening his eyes. Barely. Suga _paid_ for the non-roommate option – he'll never deal with another Kuroo again. This roommate seems to be an angel – not on the holy gentleness part, because they're damn cold, more on the gleaming-white-skin part. As in literally white. They're seething, mumbling about how he shouldn't be here, and then float to the window to open it, violently.

"What the hell."

oo

Nice, if they start to see things this early in, like, say, windows opening for no valid reason, they'll leave soon. Faster than the last roommate, hopefully. And not dead. The windows clapping open and letting the cold air in usually do the trick.

"You're floating."

 _What_.

oo

He has a roommate, and they're floating. Like. Like a ghost. Suga totally did not pay for that shit.

"Leave the window alone. I'm cold enough as it is."

If he goes right back to sleep maybe they'll go away. Or he'll realise it's a dream and he won't be embarrassed because no roommate saw him talk to the non-existing ghost.

oo

They can see him ? Since they went right back to sleep, turning their back to a _ghost_ , Daichi will assume they didn't. His feet are the coldest part of his body, if he stomps on their lower back…

"Fuck. Go away. I don't care about your ghost crap, just. Leave me _be_ until I've had at least twelve hours of sleep."

That settles it.

oo

Kuroo used to summon lower demons in the kitchen, because they're a shit at maths and they just had to do his homework well, that's how Suga got in touch with the Otherworld. The ghost is not pleased.

"Come on, don't be pissed. I don't know how to banish you and there's no way I'm asking Kuroo anything ever again."

"I don't care. Fuck you. Go away."

It's his flat, now. He's not about to.

oo

They're cooking something greasy again. Daichi thinks cholesterol can do the work for him and drive the roommate away – only, it'd be way too slow and he'd have to endure them groaning and failing at psychology. And talking about volleyball. _Nobody_ cares about sports clubs.

"Don't you want to leave ? Maybe you can find a roommate that's good at psych."

"No thanks. Oikawa was literal hell."

" _I_ 'm literal hell."

"No no, you don't understand. _Incubus."_

"Poor you."

He doesn't mean it.

oo

Suga doesn't understand how the ghost is supposed to be driving him away by cleaning the frying pan and making sure he eats vegetables. He actually called them "dad" once – and gosh wasn't that embarrassing. Even psych is going better now that there is no one sexually harassing him or setting goblins loose in the flat. It shouldn't be surprising if he starts saying hello to them.

oo

They're just as dumb as he thought. They haven't noticed how Daichi left trails of oily water on every plate after gathering as much as he could from the pan. They haven't noticed how bad celery tastes yet – maybe they're really, really dumb. Maybe they have no taste buds and he went through the trouble of pouring the remaining oil into the milk for nothing.

oo

Suga thinks that they often forget he can see them float from the frying pan to the cupboard and then to the fridge, and he considers drinking the milk anyway so they don't feel bad about it. Or telling him he always ate celery because his mum had some in the garden. And then he remembers that it's how it went downhill last time – "Kuroo, I don't mind that you're turning every kettle in this house into a goblin hideout or that you probably summoned Kenma using my hair so it wouldn't whiplash on you but please just let me brew tea." _I mind very much that I can't sleep at night because your fucking goblins are feasting or that_ _your demon_ _actually tried to_ drink my blood _once or that you're just forgetting how dangerous_ _this thing is and how worried I am for you._

 _oo_

Frustration is the best thing he could have hoped for. His, not theirs. They thought Daichi hadn't noticed how they were reacting to his tricks on _pur_ _pose_ – took him quite some time to get adjusted to the fact that they could freaking see him. Damned humans, getting a hold of witchcraft books and thinking they know it all. Daichi is seething, growling, relishing that anger means his hands can almost, _almost_ grip their textbook and rip it to shreds and watch them suffer and _leave_.

oo

Double checking every single thing he is going to touch isn't _this_ hard to do. It became a deeply ingrained reflex after Kenma started trying to poison the food, and it saved his ass when the goblin goo revealed itself to be toxic when baked – Suga doesn't even need to do this because his ghost is so nice they leave great, shiny trails on everything they tampered with so he can avoid it if he wants to.

It might be unintentional.

oo

They're still not leaving, they probably don't know crap about ghosts and they think they're being brave – he's worst than goblins and he'll make them regret.

They're groaning again and half buried in papers and they look miserable. Daichi can maybe wait until the mid-term is behind to really try and drive them away. And make their life a living hell while they stay, of course.

oo

Mid-terms went well, mid-terms went so smoothly it's suspicious and the ghost is probably planning something. Or maybe they just remember what mid-terms feel like.

"Why are you still eating the celery."

"I like celery. It doesn't taste as bad as everyone says."

"I wouldn't know."

What does it even mean ?

oo

He's so _angry_ he could make the windows explode but he's never really liked damaging the flat, and it wouldn't make them leave, not the way he wants them to – he wants to see them exasperated and fuming and furious and hateful and _leaving_ _them_. Not – not dead.

The windows are ok but the bathroom mirror exploded some time ago. He doesn't remember how, why, the idiot human probably tried to talk to him once more and said something nicely offensive and he lost it. They're on the ground with the broken glass, they're bleeding a bit. Maybe Daichi killed another student. He'd panic if he were in a state to care.

oo

Damn, it hurts like hell, there are shards of glass in his palms and probably on his face too – yep that's blood – maybe the Kenma and Oikawa weren't _actual_ hell.

The ghost looks even worse than him, which is a feat, because they haven't been hurt by anything, they're not even physical, why do they look like they're about to cry, _he_ should be about to cry.

oo

They're alive, good, that's good, Daichi didn't kill anyone this time. Good.

"Why are you so angry ?"

"I'm not angry."

"You blew the mirror on my head."

"And that's none of your concern."

oo

 _Please_ let it not be Kenma.

"Yo ?"

"Kuroo. Hey. You're alive."

 _I'm alive too. You sound well, I'm surprised._

"Fuck. Suga. What happened – you should have called earlier, I'm sure – fuck – are you ok ? Is the threat, like, _directly_ _in front of_ _you_ ?"

"Well. I'm not bleeding _that_ much and the ghost is not moving anymore."

"Don't fucking move I'm on my way."

oo

They said they wouldn't call an exorcist on him but here they are, with their friend and his demonic awful _awful_ smell.

"Suga. That's totally not a ghost."

Fuck you exorcist. He's a ghost, he can go through things and he makes the wooshing sound.

"Ghosts can't touch stuff, I thought you'd read the book, you should remember. That's a poltergeist."

Fuck you fuck you _fuck_ _you_.

oo

Suga never thought he'd have to deal with this – as if the goo everywhere when the goblins got out of control wasn't enough to want to _leave_.

"It's a poltergeist, it's attached to the house. People probably did nasty stuff here and the house awoken it to protect itself."

"So you're telling me you can't do anything and I have to leave ?!"

Nope. That won't happen. He'll stay and the ghost, poltergeist, _angry_ _roommate_ , will just have to cope.

oo

"I want a truce."

"I don't care. Go away already."

"It's my flat, too."

It's _his_ flat, _his_ home, fuck them, fuck the exorcist, fuck everything that ever was – fuck himself for listening to them.

oo

Suga shouldn't, he knows that when you stick your nose in their problems magical creatures become itchy and then they try to kill you, but hey, his ghost already did that, so nothing to lose on that point.

"Hey… are you ok ?"

"Leave me be. I wasn't even doing anything."

"Yeah, that's getting me worried."

"I can go back to maiming you if you like that better."

oo

If they think they can look stern and scold him into submission and force him to talk about his "very obvious problems", they're wrong. If they think talking about their problems will make him open up…

oo

" _Kenma, if you'd just stop ignoring him for more than one second-"_

" _Shut up. I'm not talking to Kuroo."_

" _You don't have to. Just… can't you…"_

" _He'll banish me if I do that._ Banish _. Maybe even_ exorcise _. You suggested that, I assume. Kuroo likes me too much to do that."_

" _He doesn't-"_

" _He likes me more than you, and you know I can't lie, so stop trying."_

 _oo_

"Of course demons can lie. And your friend seemed mostly ok. He probably banished the pest."

They don't seem to feel better about that, but hey, they're talking about a demon that tried to poison their coffee to the poltergeist that put shampoo in their cheese. And Daichi doesn't feel bad about doing it and maybe they'll be too embarrassed to live here anymore and they'll _finally_ leave.

oo

The ghost actually gave advice, and pretty good one at that. And they make sure he eats veggies and remind him about his homework. They're probably not doing this on purpose but the truth is, they're the best roommate Suga ever had, and he's not giving up on that.

oo

He's- he's still angry, _very_ angry, when is he not. But he's stopped trying to kill them. It can't really be helped, when they're leeching on this house like it belongs to them.

"What do you think you're doing ?"

"I'm cleaning the windows, duh."

Tss, they should stop trying to _please_ him. It won't work.

oo

 _Suga has never felt horny in his life, never_ ever _to the point where it almost worried him, but this sort of pull and push coming from his roommate might be it._

" _Suuugaaa… I'm hungry…"_

" _But I don't want to have sex with you."_

" _You don't think I'm pretty ?"_

" _What does this have to do with anything ?!"_

" _If you make out with me I'll help with that psych chapter."_

" _Fuck you, Oikawa."_

" _I'm_ trying."

 _oo_

And the celery didn't drive the incubus away ? Well. They finished their sob story without any sobbing, which would have been gross but a pleasant punishment, and they – they don't even look embarrassed, they just change into their pyjamas and go to bed.

"Goodnight. See you tomorrow."

oo

They think they're being nice and all. They're not. They're being annoying and awful and no.

oo

Oh god the ghost can cook. It looks so much better than a ramen cup, it's actual food – it's a cake – it's too good to be true.

"I didn't even know you'd be able to cook. What did you do the food ?"

"Nothing. Fucking eat it before it gets cold."

"You know I can't do that."

The ghost actually starts to colour at that, darker hair, darker eyes, darker skin. Not a good sign, Kuroo said, not at all. Maybe Suga can try and eat the cake.

oo

Fuck them and their nice face and since when do they have a mole next to their eye. Daichi made them cake. Daichi is a mess and it's sheer anger that makes him tangible enough to hold the dishes in his hands like this but they don't seem to understand that touching stuff equals him in a sour mood and they're smiling and Daichi thinks he can punch the walls at this point.

oo

The cake tasted good. Suga is still alive and it's been ten days. He made sure to thank the ghost a lot and he also started painting the cupboard doors. House spirit, Kuroo had said, so let's appease the house spirit.

oo

"It's ok, you know. Me being here."

Oh please.

"I don't mean to intrude. I don't want to… you know, harm the house."

What the hell.

"I'm just glad I can live here because it's cosy ? And you're not so bad. You cook quite well."

Stop it fuck that he's not even supposed to _like_ humans.

"Move, imma lay on the bed too for a while."

oo

The absolute weirdness of cuddling through someone isn't stopping his ghost from sleeping – is that sleeping – laying down through him and when he rumbles it echoes deep in Suga's chest and wow.

They're not moving, and they're not being grossed out, and he's actually feeling warmth from the places that overlap and it's quite good ? The anger is still here, let's not fool himself on that point, but. He's not as tangible anymore.

"You know what, let's say I agree on the truce. Can you wash the sink with bleach next time ?"

"Deal."

* * *

This is shorter than what I planned but I have a more developped AU about ghost!Daichi that will maybe be written down (I need to stop saying this and actually write my AUs down damn it ^^). I hope you liked it !


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